Help

FREE SHIPPING on orders over $119.00

Guide to Bondage Furniture

For those who have dabbled in BDSM, the idea of having their own personal dungeon has crossed their mind at least once. The convenience of having a scene right in their personal space sounds sexy and intimate! It’s a big choice to make because most of these items take up space. However, for those who truly embrace the endless possibilities that many of these items can offer, it is one they don’t regret!

In this guide we will go over what bondage furniture is, where these items originated, how to use them and we will give some great recommendations on which ones to get started with!

Guide to Bondage Furniture

For those who have dabbled in BDSM, the idea of having their own personal dungeon has crossed their mind at least once. The convenience of having a scene right in their personal space sounds sexy and intimate! It’s a big choice to make because most of these items take up space. However, for those who truly embrace the endless possibilities that many of these items can offer, it is one they don’t regret!

In this guide we will go over what bondage furniture is, where these items originated, how to use them and we will give some great recommendations on which ones to get started with!

Show Me The Best Recommended Items!

Table of Contents

What is Bondage Furniture?

Bondage furniture includes large items that can be used to enhance a BDSM (Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/submission, Sadism/Masochism) scene. Unlike bedroom bondage which makes use of small spaces by incorporating items that can easily be broken down and stored away, or straps that can tie someone to themselves or to the bed, bondage furniture includes items that are generally large and stationary.

Furniture like this can be used to enhance sex and kink scenes by making it easier to shackle, tie up or cuff a submissive to a heavy, stationary item. Many of the items are also large enough to support the full body weight of the submissive, so they can rest on the bench, table or sling. Furniture can also be used to achieve the opposite by causing the submissive to have their arms and body lifted up or their hands chained above them to a cross or locked in a pillory so they’re forced to stand during the scene. However, these items also support the Dominant’s role; most of them are at hip-level or adjustable, which lets them stand rather than crouch. This small adjustment promotes situations that are ergonomic and protect the physical well-being of the Dom by putting them in positions of power and ease when they thrust, whip or spank the submissive.

Some of the smaller bondage furniture items are things that are easily taken out, used and then put away. For example, bed restraints are often small restraints that can be packed up tightly and hidden in a closet, or tucked under the bed for later use. Many of them don’t require bedposts or anchors to be tied to. They can be wrapped around the mattress itself or the legs of the bed. In doing so, the bed itself becomes a type of bondage furniture; it’s weight makes it a stable and heavy piece of furniture for restraints to be attached to.

For those who want to play with levels of height and positioning, sex swings are a great start! They allow one partner to be suspended above the ground and easily moved back and forth with thrusting hips. They display the genitals in a way that makes it easy for their partner to access them for fellatio, cunnilingus, fisting and many other fun and kinky activities! Many people get sex swings for ergonimic reasons; it lifts their partner up to the level the Dominant is comfortable with so they aren’t crouching, kneeling or craning their neck in a way that hurts their back, knees or neck and shoulders.

Another option for people who enjoy a little more support are wedges and position aids. These are generally firm pillows that are shaped in ways that fit underneath the hips so the hips are raised and the bottom is lifted and exposed making it easier for some couples to have penetrative sex. Other benefits of the pillows are that a few of them are designed for masturbation and solo sex! Dildos or vibrators can be attached the pillow so someone can ride the pillow and fuck their toy with similar hip motions that they may enjoy during sex with someone else. It also makes it possible to have hands-free masturbation, which is great for those who get tired or uncomfortable holding the vibrator for so long (especially those with fibromyalgia or arthritis) or want their hands free to play with their nipples or breasts.

An upgrade to using pillows for masturbation purposes is to get a sex rocker, sex chair or sex stool. These are low-tech alternatives to sex machines that allow the person using them to enjoy solo sex or masturbation. Stools and chairs can be used to bounce up and down or grind into a vibrator or dildo. Some of the stools, such as the Bangin’ Bench Stool, also are built so a woman can sit above someone else and get their clit and pussy licked or they can bounce up and down on a dildo or cock! Rockers are usually made of metal or wood and have a dildo affixed to them. As the rider rocks back and forth, the dildo glides forward and back while inside them. What is great about these devices are that they don’t require much room and they get the whole body involved in the sensual act of grinding and writhing while also allowing control over speed and depth.

The vacubed, also known as the vacuum bed or vacbed, is a popular extension of latex and rubber fetish. The strong smell of latex or rubber combined with the feel of the material against skin is enough for many fetishists to enjoy. However, it also goes beyond just that. The vacubed is a piece of furniture that lays flat on the ground, usually forming a rectangular shape out of PVC poles. The latex stretches across it, encasing it in a sack. Someone goes inside so they are covered by latex with only a breathing hole and breathing tube sticking out. As the vacuum slowly sucks the air out of the sack, the submissive is slowly immobilized, the pressure from the latex pressing evenly against their entire body. At that point, Tops or Doms enjoy watching them writhe and squirm under the latex as they use vibrators on their body to add to the sensual and intense experience.

For those who enjoy watersports or just like getting messy, sex bedsheets are perfect for keeping things contained and out of the bedding or off the floor. They come in different sizes, but generally speaking they can cover a king size bed. They’re made of a material that keeps water from soaking through, so they’re perfect for squirt, piss or any other liquid that partners enjoy playing with. Some sheets may even inflate and create some padding with a kiddy-pool effect around the corners that keeps the mess from spilling over the edge of the sheet.

The most common piece of furniture found in a dungeon, playspace or personal collection is the bondage horse. It’s also called a vault horse, flogging horse or spanking bench. It looks a lot like a padded sawhorse that a carpenter would use. At its center, the submissive or bottom can be laid face down (or face up, if that’s comfortable) with their knees and feet supported by shelves on either side so they’re in a semi-fetal position. The furniture is padded for comfort and often has anchor points to put straps on. This puts their body in the perfect position for spankings, flogging or whipping.

Sex benches are a variation on the bondage horse. They are a little like a customized massage table that can strap down arms, legs and torso so the submissive can’t escape. It leaves their ass exposed for penetration and their body open for touch and sensation. One of the benefits of these benches is that they leave the body a little more open and exposed than a bondage horse and the arms and legs can each be adjusted to the desired height. This is great for submissives that don’t feel as secure or comfortable on a bondage horse.

The St. Andrew’s Cross, otherwise known as the X-cross, X-frame or saltire after the French sautoir, is an X-shaped piece of bondage furniture that allows the Dominant to place their submissive in a spread eagle position with their ankles, wrists and waist restrained. St. Andrew’s Crosses are stationary, unlike the Catharine Wheel which looks similar but can rotate upside down with the submissive still restrained. This item gets its name from the cross St. Andrew (the apostle) was crucified upon. It is said the Romans didn’t believe him worthy enough to be crucified on a cross in the way that Jesus was, so they crucified him on an X rather than a T shape. It is one the best beginner bondage furniture items as it is simple to use and can be taken down or put up fairly easily.

Some of these furniture items, such as the pillory, stockade or cage are often used in tandem with erotic humiliation. These forms of bondage were traditionally used on criminals, prisoners or offenders and the pillory and stockade in particular were items that were located in a public space, such as a town square, so everyone could see the embarrassment and shame of the individuals and contribute to their torment.

While humiliation is something most people avoid due to the deep feelings of shame and guilt it brings up, others play with this psychological edge. They want to feel embarrassment and be told how slutty, dirty, shameful, stupid, pathetic, girly (if they are masculine), or useless they are. During verbal humiliation, people may insult them or make fun of their small penis, small breasts, their weight or other physical attributes. They may give them a task that is not easy for the submissive or bottom to do and ridicule them when they fail to do it correctly.

The Top or Dominant may also urinate, spit, defecate or ejaculate on the bottom they are humiliating. Slapping them in the face, choking them with their cock or dildo and making them gag and whipping or slapping the breasts or genitals are also often included during these scenes. Some submissives are made to be footstools for the Dominant to put their feet up on, or a table for them to place a plate upon (which is a form of forniphilia, or objectifying a person to the point they are literally treated as a piece of furniture). Others are made into human ashtrays and the Dominant will smoke in front of them and ash their cigar or cigarette into the submissive’s open mouth.

Some kinks that aren’t inherently humiliating on their own can also be incorporated in a humiliation scene if the submissive finds the kink humiliating. For example, if a heterosexual man finds sucking another man’s cock humiliating, then the Dominant may make him do that (after negotiating it, of course). Being dressed up as an animal or a baby as a kink may be fun and liberating for one person, but for others it would be embarrassing. Simply being naked in front of others can be a form of erotic humiliation.

When bound to a piece of furniture that exposes the bare ass and genitals of a submissive, it is very easy to combine erotic humiliation with bondage. Those who are put in a pillory, stockade, or locked in a cage may experience humiliation, extreme vulnerability, forced orgasms, a sense of helplessness, or even feel like an animal that is locked away. When done consensually, it can be a huge turn on for both parties involved and pushes their physical and psychological edges.

The pillory, also known as healsfang in Anglo-Saxon, pillorie in French, shaandpal or “shame pole” in Dutch, pelourinho in Portuguese and the cangue in Chinese is one of the most iconic tools used for bondage and public humiliation. Often confused with stockades, it is defined traditionally as a wooden board with three holes cut in it (one for the head and two for the hands) that hinges closed in order to restrain the punished individual while they are standing or bent over. The stockade is similar in design and use but was meant for restraining the feet while the one restrained by it is seated or lying down.

There are several variations of the pillory that have shown up in so many different countries over time that it is difficult to limit it to only one description. It can be a board that someone has to wear on the head over their shoulders. It can be attached to a pole and double as a whipping post. It can be chained or affixed high above the offender to become hanging stocks wherein the offender would be lifted onto the tips of their toes with their head and hands (or only their hands) locked above them. In all cases, the person locked in the pillory is held captive and on public display; the point of a pillory is in part to humiliate the one pilloried. The pillory was used so often from 820 AD to the early 1800’s that an English term adopted it as a verb, “to pillory”, meaning to humiliate, ridicule or publicly abuse someone. For more historical variations on pillories and stockades, read more here.

Similar to the whip, before pillories were used on people, they were used on livestock and were called a yoke. A simple board or bar of wood was used around the necks, horns or heads of oxen or draft animals for them to pull against. It locked their head into place next to another ox so they would pull the rigid bar of wood together. It wasn’t long before this yoke was then fashioned into a smaller version to lock slaves or criminals in place with head and hands fixed firmly in place so they could not set themselves free. The word pillory is derived from the French pillorie, but the uses of pillories are so old that the origin of the pillory is uncertain. All we know is that they’ve been used in one form or another across the world wherever there has been agricultural work animals and corporal punishment.

Oftentimes the pillory was located in the town square of each city or town and would serve as a visual deterrent to others who may consider breaking the laws of the town. Many of the laws were not only legal but religious and social, as well. If the church or head of the townsfolk deemed that someone had broken a social or religious law such as public drunkenness, adultery, libel (speaking falsehoods about someone) or sedition (inciting rebellion), they would be sentenced to a specific amount of hours in the pillory.

During this time, townsfolk were free to exact their own punishment on the helpless offender. They would throw rotten food such as cabbages, tomatoes and old fish, offal (fecal matter or poop) from the local livestock or dogs, rotten eggs, clumps of mud or even rocks at the offender. All of this occurred while calling the imprisoned individual names and publicly attacking their character, shaming them for what they had done. Unless the pillory or stockade was set high up on a platform, it was placed at ground level and anyone walking by could kick, pinch, flog, whip, spit on or tickle the ones stuck in the stockades. For those who were left without a guard present, other crude punishments could be exacted, as well. If the pillory was chest or hip height, the offender was forced to assume a bent over position. They could not move their body without extreme discomfort. Some prisoners were stripped of their clothing down to their undergarments to cause them even more shame. For women especially, this put them at risk of being raped or molested while in the pillory.

Generally speaking, the crowd was not allowed to harm the one in the pillory to the point of death, but some historical accounts recall that the offender’s eyes had been pelted so brutally that they went blind. Sometimes, the judge would order that their ears be nailed to the post so they could not look away from the crowd while having projectiles thrown at them, which often meant that they would tear an ear free while struggling to escape. The pillory was also used as a whipping post and while the prisoner was in the pillory, their bottom and back were perfectly exposed to be flogged and whipped. Nearly all those who were sentenced to the pillory were shamed to an irreversible point in which, even after their sentence had been completed, they bore the shame of having been in the stockade or pillory.

England formally abolished use of the pillory in 1837. The United States last used the pillory in 1901, but the state of Delaware did not formally abolish the use of the pillory until March of 1905. The whipping post was not abolished in Delaware, however, until 1972. There are still places in the world that will use the pillory or stockades as forms of punishment, but it is not as frequently chosen as a punishment as it used to be hundreds of years prior.

The use of stockades or a pillory in BDSM today intensifies the scene. It brings about a whole new level of authenticity and realism. It can be extremely erotic to be tied up with nylon straps, rope or leather, but when someone is locked into wood or metal, it enhances the psychological and physical experience tenfold. The feeling of helplessness combined with vulnerability heightens the emotions as adrenaline kicks in, despite the submissive’s best efforts to remind themselves that this, like all things BDSM, is just a consensual game for adults. For some, the heavy weight of the metal or wood is comforting. It is solid and secure which makes them, in turn, feel safe and secure and free to drop into a submissive state that is otherwise challenging for them to reach when bound with more fragile or easily broken restraints.

For others, it is the psychological arousal that comes from humiliation, embarrassment and shame. There’s nothing quite like having their arms and head locked into a position that limits movement, reach and sight while their ass is entirely exposed for anyone present to tease, torment or have their way with. The bondage horse, while not as taxing on the body as the pillory, still keeps the submissive securely bound, restrained and exposed.

Why You Need Bondage Furniture

The use of bondage furniture in a household, dungeon or playspace is fairly personal. It’s best to choose furniture that enhances the scene, cuts down on prep time (such as putting things together and then having to take them apart and pack them away) and is a valuable asset to lifestylers who want to incorporate BDSM into their life 24/7.

While dungeons definitely are known to be decked out in gear and furniture, even one item changes the feel of a room and opens up so many opportunities for erotic, kinky play. There are several reasons people invest in these larger items. The following explore ways that people enjoy bondage furniture and what inspires them to get these high ticket items and bring them home!

  • Erotic Humiliation Classic items such as the pillory and stockades have a long history of being used for public humiliation. Furniture like this is still used privately to render the submissive or bottom (consensually) helpless and to humiliate, shame or embarrass them. It is very important to note that due to the psychological nature of this kind of scene, it must be pre-negotiated, participants have safe-words and it should not be practiced by beginners or new partners.
  • Comfortable & Ergonomic Positions Tables, benches and crosses are set up to make it easy for the Dominant to spank, whip, tease and play with the submissive. Most of these items allow the Dominant to stand and move around freely while the submissive is in one place, their body exposed and open to the degree that the Dominant desires.
  • Ease of Access As mentioned above, the furniture is adjustable. The Dominant can adjust the table to be at a position that allows the submissive’s ass to be spanked, their pussy to be teased, their holes to be filled. All of these fun activities are generally easier to access when the Dom is able to stand rather than when the submissive is on the ground or on a bed.
  • Disability This ties into Ease of Access; bondage furniture can be more comfortable (if the Dominant permits it) to the submissive because of supportive positions. For those who aren’t comfortable on the floor or a bed or chair, some of these tables or horses support their torso so they can relax their arms and legs and receive. Additionally, if the Dominant has a physical disability, having an adjustable table in the middle of a room actually makes it easier for them to move around on a wheelchair and use their upper body to flog, whip or spank their submissive.
  • Bondage Benches, tables and horses make it easier to restrain the submissive or bottom during a scene. Additionally, most of these items are comfortable for both Dom and sub.
  • Physically Strong Bottoms In situations where the submissive is physically larger or stronger than the Dominant, having heavy, sturdy furniture to tie them to and strong straps makes it easier to keep them restrained during a scene. Taking measures to make sure the submissive or bottom isn’t going to break free maintains the fantasy for both of them and can also keep the Dominant safe if the submissive reacts without thinking and breaks free or flails an arm or leg while being tickled or teased.
  • Dungeon Aesthetic Whether you’re a Pro-Domme or a lifestyle Dom, having bondage furniture makes a big difference in how you play or have sessions. Many Pro-Dominants require a setup of some kind in order to facilitate a session. If they’re in a dungeon, most of the equipment is stationary and not easily moved. However, a sex swing, vacubed, and some other items can be packed up for travel and used in a hotel room for clients who aren’t able to visit the dungeon. For lifestylers able to dedicate a part of their living space to kink, having a St. Andrew’s Cross, a bondage horse, bench or table makes a huge difference and really sets the scene for them and their partner.
  • Watersports People who enjoy urine-play where people wet themselves or each other benefit from a sex bedsheet because it protects the surfaces they are playing on from getting soaked or stained from urine.
  • Messy Sex If partners want to enage in sploshing (messy food play), wax play (dripping hot wax over their partner), using edible paints or massage oils, a sex bedsheet can help protect the ground or bed that it’s covering.
  • Squirt, Lube & Cum If someone squirts a lot, it can soak the bed. The dampness seeps in and can cause a smell to linger over time. Having a barrier is helpful and cuts down on doing laundry! The same applies to using a lot of lube or wanting to keep the surface you’re on clean from cum-stains. Sex bedsheets take away worry or concern for making a mess or leaving stains.
  • Objectification Vacuum beds often cover the entire length of the body but may leave access to the mouth and genitals. For some, this means that they can leave only the cock, pussy and mouth out. Some people ride the exposed cock, or others use vibrators on the person restrained inside the vacubed and enjoy watching them writhe beneath the latex.
  • Unique Sensation Vacuum beds squeeze and suction the entire body while (usually) muting some sound and taking away any sight. The smell of the latex can also be an overwhelming smell so that the one in the bed only smells the bed, can no longer see anything in the dark, and barely hears a thing. It is not total sensory deprivation but it does shift the way they feel and sense their surroundings. With these other senses muted, the submissive feels the pressure of the vacuum seal and every touch from hands or toys even more intensely.
  • Solo Sex The use of sex pillows that have dildos or vibrators attached to them make masturbation way more satisfying. These items make it possible to ride or grind the pillow in a similar way that people would during sex.

Types of Bondage Furniture

  • Bondage Bed Restraints These restraint systems are made to tie your partner to the bed. While a few of them require bed posts or eye-hooks, most of them are ready to go and don’t require anything except the bed itself. This type of item belongs more in the bedroom bondage category (see Guide to Bedroom Bondage), but falls under the category of furniture if left in place as a fixed item in the room.
  • Sex Bedsheets and Vacubeds Enjoy watersports or messy play? A sex bedsheet creates a barrier between the floor, bedsheets or bed and any sploshing juices, squirt, urine, water or lubricants used. Vacubeds are unique items that suction the entire person into a sleeping sack or bed and cause their entire body to feel compression.
  • Sex Benches and BDSM Horses Benches and bondage horses are furniture pieces that allow a submissive to be strapped to a solid and stable table or bench-like item and fucked or teased at hip level. These are considered solid and sturdy items.
  • Sex Chairs, Stools & Rockers Devices that are similar in many ways to some fucking machines but generally do not require a motor to work; they function by means of the user rocking, grinding or sitting on them and they enhance sex or masturbation.
  • Sex Pillows, Wedges and Position Aids These help partners position themselves in a variety of poses with pillows, wedges and other devices that support easier access to the genitals and body and can reduce discomfort or strain during sex.
  • Sex Swings and Slings Meant to lift one partner up so they are suspended during sex. They can be hung on the back of a door or from a hardpoint in the ceiling.
  • Stockades, Pillories and Cages The stockades and pillories are furniture that keep the head and hands (pillory) or feet (stockades) immobile by locking them into place with a board. Cages are generally large enough for one person and commonly have large, horizontal bars. These are considered solid and sturdy items

Materials

Silicone

  • Most preferred material used for sex toys
  • Easily cleaned before and after use
  • Hypoallergenic and non-porous

To Clean:

  • Wash with an antibacterial soap and warm water. Wipe clean with a soft cloth.

Safety:

  • Do not use with silicone-based lube.

Rubber

  • More affordable than silicone, great for beginners
  • More porous than silicone, so harder to keep clean
  • Can’t easily be disinfected

To Clean:

  • Rubber is very porous and the chemical composition of each brand varies.
  • Some rubber products contain phthalates which can be harmful to your health.
  • Wash with mild soap and warm water and let air dry.
  • Keep in a cool, dark place once dry.

Metal: Zinc alloy, Copper, Stainless Steel, Aluminum:

  • These are a few of the most common metals used in toys and equipment. Read the product description for more information on which specific metal is used.

To Clean: Can be boiled, or disinfected with medical grade body-safe disinfectants.


ABS Plastic (acrylonitrile butadiene styrene):

  • A thermoplastic polymer that has a low melting point (can easily be melted and molded into different shapes).

To Clean:

  • Use warm water and mild soap and wipe with a soft, cotton cloth.

Polypropylene:

  • A type of plastic commonly used to make bottle caps, bottles, fittings and other shapes.

To Clean:

  • Wash with warm water and mild soap.

Leather

  • Sexy and a classic
  • Durable
  • Porous; harder to keep clean.
  • Needs to be washed/cleaned after every exposure with bodily fluids

To Clean:

  • Wipe clean with warm water and mild soap.
  • Let air dry.
  • Moisturize with saddle soap and mink oil.

PU (polyurethane) Leather & Leatherette

  • Vegan, imitation leather
  • Less porous than leather; easier to clean

To Clean:

  • PU leather can be washed and dry-cleaned.
  • Leatherette and PU leather can be wiped down with mild soap and water, then air dried.

Polycarbonate (PC) Plastic

  • A versatile thermoplastic that is easily molded and multi-colored
  • Similar in transparency to glass
  • Stronger than conventional plastic

To Clean:

  • Wash with mold soap and lukewarm water using a damp sponge or soft cloth to avoid scratching. Do not scrub or apply heavy pressure. Rinse water often and blot dry with soft cloth or chamois.

Polycarbonate (PC) Plastic

  • Stretchy, form fitting and easy to wash

To Clean:

  • Hand wash in cold water with laundry detergent.
  • Air dry or lay flat to dry.

Buyer’s Guide to Bondage Furniture

Investing in your first bondage furniture can be tricky. How will you know what to get? Is it something that will last? Have others had good experiences with this product? Luckily, through time, trial and error, we have found which ones work best for those just starting out or those in the lifestyle for a while. Below are some of the most popular items to choose from!

Bedroom Restraints

Bedroom Restraint Kit Perfect for beginners. Tie up your lover to any bed. No bedposts needed.

Deluxe Bed Restraint Kit A little more advanced, this kit includes PU leather cuffs that have adjustable buckles.

Sex Bedsheets & Vacubeds

King Size Waterproof Fitted Sex Sheet Get messy with this fitted sheet that covers the entire bed!

Sex Benches & BDSM Horses

Obedience Estreme Sex Bench Adjust the height and strap the submissive in. This item is bound to create an intense and fun evening!

Sex Chairs, Stools & Rockers

Bangin Bench Stool Bounce on your favorite cock or lower your pussy down for cunnilingus. This bench is great for solo or couple play!

Love Glider Fucking Machine Glide into pleasure with this erotic fucking bench! Completely silent so it won’t wake the neighbors. Needs no electricity to work.

Sex Pillows, Wedges & Position Aids

Open Wide Padded Thigh Sling Position Aid Keep their legs spread open with this sexy, PU leather thigh sling.

Mount Me Inflatable Position Pillow Have your partner climb on top of this pillow and find the perfect position for both of you with the aid of the plush support.

XL Bondage Board Travel friendly and versatile, this is perfect for the dungeon away from home! It can be folded up and put in a closet for privacy, as well.

Sex Swings & Slings

D'Luxe Entry Love Sling with Seat Hang this sex sling over the door for easy mounting. No hard points or drilling necessary.

360 Spinning Sex Swing Suspend this sex swing from a hardpoint and enjoy fucking your partner in any number of positions!

Stockades, Pillories & Cages

The Cock and Ball Pillory This pillory is a combination of restraint and CBT (Cock and ball torture). It keeps them standing in place with their ankles locked firmly to the pillory while the cock and ball crusher keeps them close to the pillory. If they move, they’ll feel the painful pull against their balls and cock.

Kennel Adjustable Puppy Cage with Padded Board This metal cage has a removable padded board. There is no hinged gate. Instead, the bars can be lifted and slid in and out of place before being locked shut.

Safety

Safety:

DO NOT leave your submissive alone while restrained!
It can be very dangerous to leave the submissive alone while restrained or captive. If they don’t have a way to tell you they are feeling nauseous, lightheaded, dehydrated, faint or panicking and anxious, it can be detrimental to their health. Be responsible for your submissive at all times while they are locked up.

Be cautious when using VacuBeds; make sure they can breathe.
There is a risk of positional asphyxia where the person who is restrained ends up in a position that makes it difficult for them to breathe. This can cause them to pass out or suffocate and die. Additionally, it is very important to ensure that the breathing holes and/or tubes used are not obstructed.

When negotiating a scene that includes humiliation, be careful of triggers.
It’s very important to be clear about what words, names, actions and scenarios are welcome and which ones will push the submissive or bottom over the edge and into a psychologically unsafe space. Some women enjoy being called a slut but not a bitch. Some men want you to make fun of their penis size, but not to tell them they aren’t good at sex. In other cases, pissing on someone can be welcome, but spitting in their face is unwelcome. Be clear and make sure to not push any edges during the first time trying out erotic humiliation.

Make it easy to get out of restraints, especially with new partners.
Scenes don’t go the same way every time (which is part of what makes them fun). So, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that some of them can trigger stress, emotion, memories or feelings of claustrophobia and panic. Make sure it is easy for you to release the submissive or bottom if they are getting triggered by something that comes up during a scene.

Safewords are still sexy (and important)!
Even for basic BDSM, having a safeword or a safe “signal” (that may be nonverbal for those who are gagged or for partners who are deaf) is part of building trust within a relationship and a scene. For more advanced and edgy or risky scenes, having a way to tell someone that the scene needs to pause, slow down, that a check-in is required, or that it needs to STOP right at that moment is necessary in keeping all participants safe.

When using a St. Andrew’s Cross, make sure it is stable.
Have a good look at the cross before using it. Pull at it and make sure it won’t fall. Check that it’s sturdy so the submissive doesn’t knock it down and injure themself or you.

When using restraints, especially with any limbs above the head or heart, make sure to check in and don’t make the restraints too tight!
If the restraints are too tight, it could cut off circulation. If the limbs are held above the head too long, it will cause the heart rate of the submissive to speed up, which is not healthy for some people and can cause issues.

Don’t lose the key!
With restraints of any kind, but especially ones that are more or less immobile (such as pillories, stockades or cages) make sure not to lose the key to any locks!

Sanitation is important!
After each scene, make sure to clean the furniture used so bacteria doesn’t grow. Depending on the type of scene and items used, also be mindful of any bodily fluids that could transmit STIs (Sexually Transmitted Infections aka STDs).

Expert Tips & Advice

Set up bondage furniture with plenty of space around them.
Make sure when you’re placing furniture in a room that there’s plenty of space to walk around and use implements such as floggers and whips.

Keep cleaning supplies on hand.
In order to keep your furniture nice for a long time, and in order to keep things sanitary, keep cleaning supplies nearby and do gentle cleaning after each session or scene. Wipe surfaces clean and let them air dry.

If your submissive has sensitive skin, put padding on the restraints.
For metal or wood furniture, consider adding a little extra padding for sensitive bottoms or submissives. If they are kneeling, it could be very painful to stay in the position as long as you’d like them to if the surface is hard.

Try the equipment yourself!
Switch places with your partner and have them restrain you. After you’re in the pillory, stockade or cage, struggle to get out so you can really get a good understanding of how durable the furniture is and how hard it is to escape.

FAQ

What type of furniture would my partner enjoy the most?
This is a great conversation to have with a partner. But if that conversation can’t happen or if you don’t currently have a partner, pick furniture that is compatible with your interests. For example, if you really like spanking, consider getting a spanking bench. If you like flogging or whipping, a St. Andrew’s Cross is perfect. If you want to have their body adjust to a variety of positions, consider a position aid or sex pillow. Simply imagine what you’d enjoy doing the most and find the items that support those activities.

How do I clean these items?
Make sure to look at the materials each item is made of and consult the Materials and Cleaning section above.

Are these items safe for beginners?
BDSM activities usually stray from what the general public is taught (which isn’t a lot to begin with). With any new activity comes a learning curve. However, things can be learned faster with mentorship and community. Large furniture items like the St. Andrew’s Cross or a bondage bench or table are generally safe for those starting out. The truth is that everything has a risk, so be careful, cautious and mindful in everything that you do.


Disclaimer: XR LLC sells these products as novelty toys only and is not responsible for damages due to use or misuse.