Help 1-866-4MY-BDSM

Introducing Bondage and Sex Toys To Your Routine

sportsheets couple engaged in bondageMany couples utilize sex toys in and out of the bedroom. And many people wish to enjoy them, but aren’t quite sure how to broach the subject with their partner. Bringing up the subject of trying something new and kinky can be a little unnerving for some people. Whether you are considering introducing a vibrator, butt plug or bondage equipment to your new sexual adventures, you should talk to the person you wish to vibe, plug, or bind in advance of the fantastic event. The main thing to remember is to speak honestly and listen with an open mind. You have everything to gain from a candid discussion with your sexual partner. The largest sexual organ is the easiest to stimulate-the brain. There are many ways to open the door to a productive conversation.

 

Sometimes a good preliminary step to introducing a new sexual aid or activity is to become knowledgeable about the subject. This will make you more comfortable with the idea and better able to answer the questions your partner may have. There are basic books about sex toys like Toygasms! Various kinky how-to manuals such as the Kama Sutra of Sexual Positions, S/M 101, and The Erotic Bondage Handbook by Jay Wiseman. There are also more advanced publications about alternative lifestyle choices such as Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns and The Compleat Slave. Erotic novels such as Sleeping Beauty by Anne Rice can also make for lovely bedtime stories when read to your partner. This can be a really easy way to explore what turns both of you on as you experience a story together.

 

girl holding a heart for her sweetieOpen communication about sexual adventures most often turns longed for fantasy into sublime reality in about two sentences if approached properly. If your partner seems a little uptight, go slow and start off with some scented massage oil, or some Kama Sutra Kissable Body Powder. Both are non threatening and easy to introduce without a long explanation. They also invite some follow up conversation about other possibilities. You may want to add some erotic scented candles and a sex music cd. There are complete kits available for special evenings such as the Fantasy Suite Gift Set. If you feel comfortable, you might purchase some “add ons” for the prepackaged romance kit. Perhaps you should try out a blindfold or a vibrating egg, or maybe some playful candy cuffs or furry cuffs. These are small items you may introduce in a non threatening scenario with plenty of other things to do if your partner does not wish to try them.

 

Creating an exciting and pleasant new sexual experience will inspire a willingness to try another new thing, and more importantly will create fertile ground for a conversation about good sex and trying new things to make for even better sex between you. You might invite your lover to go on an online sex toy shopping spree with you. This way, in the privacy of your own home you can discuss what you might like to try next. You may even surprise yourself at what you will find that appeals to you. The amount of sexual enhancers available is amazing.  An added benefit when you buy sex toys online is the anticipation of the arrival of the ticket to paradise bound in a plain brown wrapper and the fun you will have together when it gets to your doorstep. This is a delicious secret the two of you share. As you await your next sexual adventure, this is a good time to exchange some steamy emails as you conspire about your next erotic rendezvous.

 

body sex swingAs you learn more about one another and add to your repertoire of sexual turn ons, you may want to move ahead to more advanced sexual play such as electro sex or a sex swing. If you enjoyed light bondage it might be time to move on to heavier bondage, like moving from velcro cuffs to leather ones. Or if you have enjoyed some sensual light spanking, you may want to introduce some more intense tools for your impact play such as a suede flogger or English tawse or a thuddier tool like a paddle. Be sure that both people are comfortable with the new adult toys before using them. Start off slowly, it is much easier to add more intensity to a sexual scene than it is to reduce the level if it proves to be too much.

 

Sometimes, fantasy cannot withstand the harsher environment of reality. This happens to all couples who are on a fulfilling sexual journey together. Do not worry if things don’t go as planned, if it is appropriate laugh about it together. Enter each new level of sexual play thoughtfully. Discuss the needs of both partners and the expectations of an erotic scene. Be sure to remember that effective communication is as much about listening closely as it is about speaking clearly and honestly. Keeping this in mind, and being willing to compromise once in awhile will help you and your partner achieve your goal of fulfilling and gratifying sex.

 

Recommended Categories: Sportsheets | Bedroom Bondage

If you want to take toys with you we have a handy travel with sex toys guide.

This guide was written by Justine Case, Sex Toy Connoseur